As Though It Were Yesterday...

April 3, 1979... how could so much time have passed, but it has. My baby is having her 29th birthday today and I can remember holding this little dark-haired beauty for the first time among the IV tubes and monitors after a risky emergency C-section; looking into her tiny newborn face with it's perfectly formed features; her warm breath on my chest as a sweet nurse helped me hold her there. Emily was my last baby and I was in awe of her; wanting to somehow capture that quiet moment forever. I remember even as I am writing this, as though it were yesterday. What deep love I felt then and now, and I hover over and protect those memories and this moment like a mother bird protecting her nest with her wings and with her life. I can close my eyes and be back in our small house at 1415 Vernon in Plainview, Texas and I can almost feel what it was like with my newest little one sleeping soundly in her frilly white bassinet right next to my bed. I can once again feel the weight of her as I pick her up and cradle her in my arms. I can imagine the softness of her hair and her chubby baby skin if I try. Thank You Lord for memories. Life goes on, but isn't it nice that sometimes we can go back to a time of treasured experiences that we hold in our hearts forever? My baby, my youngest child, Emily Joy, fills my heart and mind today. We had a very hard and critical time getting her out of the womb and into my arms, but by God's grace and His merciful hand we are both alive and well and learning to love each other at a deeper level than ever before. I think the love of a child is more of a trusting dependence on being cared for and loved by others rather than purposefully loving; then there is a breaking away that begins in those middle years; emotionally painful in many ways, but needful as our little ones reach out to find their own way. Rebellion sometimes happens, but not only by the child. I've learned as I look back, the rebellion of a mother who longs to keep her babies with her, yet knowing she can't and that she must not is just as real. Growing up happens for both mother and child, and though usually difficult, it is always good. Growing up ushers in that strong and deep love we share as adults I believe. A richness that I never imagined and a freedom so priceless that brings about a common bond of honor, respect and so much joy. I love my baby girl. I love the way she can make me laugh and how she cares for others. I love that she stands strong for Truth and justice for all. I love the woman my little girl has become. Happy Birthday Emily Joy.